Nipples

I've gotta love my family.

I introduced my...um...what's the correct title for him? Non-boyfriend? We'll go with that. I introduced my non-boyfriend to my mom this week. Normally, when I'm introducing someone that I like to my family I'm a little apprehensive. The one person in my family that I can normally count on to be fairly normal (at least at first) is my mom. She can be a bit overprotective and questioning but I'm fairly sure most mothers are that way.

Well, I must have caught her on a bad night. The very first thing she says to him after the "hello"'s and "nice to meet you"'s is...get ready...

NIPPLES.

She says, "Oh, you do have nipples!".

....

Oh dear God.

...

Without missing a beat, he responds while looking down at his chest,"Yeah, I've tried to get rid of them but I just can't seem to".

Oh, non-boyfriend. You just kind of made me love you.

Turns out she said DIMPLES but all we heard was nipples. I mean, wow. Well, now. At least meeting the rest of the family won't be so shocking.

My brother and Dad ended up coming over for dinner and I'm sitting at the dinner table stealing glances at him just to see how he's taking the craziness. My brother is like a stand up comic/dancer/five year old, my mom is being a typical Italian mama tellin my Dad and brother what they need to do if they know what's good for them, my Dad is singing Elvis...

Oh dear God. Why did I invite him again?

Good news is that this whole debacle was on Thursday and he's come around since then so I'm guessing that they didn't scare him too badly.

Maybe I'll invite him for Thanksgiving and my dad will say penis. One can only hope.