New Year's = Blah Year's

New Year's Eve is probably one of my least favorite "holidays" followed closely by New Year's Day. It's not that I'm opposed to the idea of it. It sounds nice. Like, oh, let's think about this past year and remember all the good things then say good-bye. But I hate saying good-bye. It's bittersweet. And, quite honestly, I think that bittersweet is worse than just plain bad.

It's not just that the day is bittersweet for me but I always have high hopes and it never turns out right. It's partially because I'm usually so focused on Christmas that I never make plans until last minute for New Year's Eve. And that never works.

This year I've forgone the couple's-only party (thanks, Lauren, but I can't. Other times during the year I don't have a problem being single but Christmas and New Year's Eve are the two times of the year that it stings a little), the cousin's family's party (I don't feel very social) and a couple of other invites just because I don't want to be kissed by a stranger (or practical stranger) at the stroke of midnight. I'm just feeling very "blah" about the whole thing.

So, guess what I'm going to be doing? Having dinner with the ex and then going to see a movie. Disfunctional? Probably. But... he's the only one that I feel like I don't have to pretend to be excited about New Year's Eve with. He's even more anti-New Year's than I am.

Enjoy your stupid New Year's Eve! I'm going to go and indulge in a little feeling-sorry-for-myself...

That's A Lot of Somethin'...

While visiting my family in Hanford over the weekend we watched "500 Days of Summer". I've seen the movie before with the non-boyfriend and really loved it. I think it conveys the many different facets of a relationship beautifully. Love is up and down and all over the place. Happy, sad, exciting, devastating...etc. It shows that even if you think you've found the one and even if that one breaks your heart, chances are that you were way off on them being the one anyway. Love sucks sometimes but it's never the end of the world. Appreciate the beautiful parts that it was, open your eyes to the bad things that it was and go on.

I digress...so after suggesting it, I sat down with my cousins and watched. Now, it's not a sexually graphic movie but it does have adult language and adult themes so we waited until the little ones were in bed.

Of course, as it happens, one little one didn't stay in bed. My absolutely adorable baby cousin Jolie wandered out looking for her daddy so he could rock her to sleep in the recliner. We don't really think of it and continue watching the movie. Well, there is this one scene where the female character is trying to loosen up the male character by playing a little game. They're sitting in the middle of a park and she whispers "penis". After a bit of goading from her, he says "penis" just a little louder. In turn, she says it a bit louder, then he says it even louder. So goes the game till she ends up screaming the word and he playfully tackles her and clamps his hand over her mouth. At that point we all start laughing.

Thing is...I'm pretty sure we all forgot that there were little ears listening. All of a sudden we hear (from a sweet little 5 year old's voice), "That's a lot of penis!".

Did that really just come from a 5 year old? Yes. Yes it did. Jeff and Jen, next time I come up I'm going to teach your 3 year old to say va-jay-jay. You're welcome.

Requirements To Be My Man

Will Ferrell is so damn funny that I would almost marry him despite his not-so-good looks. I think Elf may be his finest work. "SANTA?! I KNOW HIM!!!". Seriously, all I have to do is look at him and he makes me want to laugh. And unfortunately, for me, just about all you have to do is to be funny and I'm smitten.

That and be a gangsta...like me.

Ahahaha. Seriously, any guy has gotta have a sense of humor to keep up with me because honestly, I'm freakin' hilarious (at the very least, I make myself laugh).

On a side note, another man I would almost marry despite his not-so-good looks although he has rock hard abs (unlike our dear Will Ferrell) is 50 Cent, or Fity as I like to call him. I mean, really, he's an upstanding guy. He raps about takin' your pants off *just a lil' bit*, get to touchin' and kissin' *just a lil' bit* and....AND if you have a baby by him you'll be a millionaire. I think it sounds like a win/win situation.

So, in closing, if I can find a man with a sense of humor like Will Ferrell, a sense of restraint (He said just a lil' bit!) with a smidgen of gangsta like Fity and the face of Jude Law then.... we'd be all good.

Yawn...

I had no idea that there were so many boring people out there.

Personality? You got one or what, son? Ah, I can see already that you don't.

Goodness, well, alright then. Go enjoy your Toby Keith and keep on being one-dimensional.

One of My Favorite Things

Santa Baby... it's only $15k. I've been an awful good girl. Honest.