Sunday, October 25, 2009

Feeling Like The Wicked Witch

Dear Kid-Skateboarding-Outside-My-Window,


I will destroy you and your little board, too.


In All Seriousness,

Sarah Ward

Friday, October 2, 2009

Happy, My Ass

Dear Always,

I don't know who in the hell does your marketing but I'm fairly sure it was a man. Your little quote, "Have a Happy Period", is complete and utter bull honkey. No woman, ever, has a happy period. It's not that we don't want a happy period but it's just not a possibility. Nothing about it is happy and every time I hear your commercial I want to throw things at my t.v.

So, just stop lying. We're not going to have a happy period if we buy your product and you're insulting our intelligence by insinuating that we will. My recommendation..."It sucks. We can help". Or, "Always + A Bottle of Wine + Chocolate = A Bearable Period".

Thank you for your time,

Sarah Ward